The title is a joke obviously, I don’t actually have a quarter life crisis. I think.
No but seriously, I turned 25 last month and it is blowing my mind. Like, how am I already mid-twenties?! It sounds so old in my mind, but also still so so young. 25 feels nothing like I always imagined it would when I was younger, which I think is the case with many things in life. Back when I was in my teens (I can’t believe I was 15 10 YEARS AGO. Even more so, I can’t believe I am closer to being in my thirties than my teens) I thought that 25 year old’s had their life together, that they had everything figured out. A job, a house, married, a dog, you know the whole thing. I wanted to be a mom at 25. No thank you. I don’t feel like I have my life together at all.
Although when I think about it realistically, I am kind of in that position a little bit. I have what I guess you could call a grown up job, a partner that I kind of seriously talk about marriage with (I promise it’s really not just me shoving photos of engagement rings in his face), we talk about maybe buying a house in the not so distant future… And typing it all out like this is really crazy, because it all sounds so grown up but I don’t feel grown up at all. I don’t feel not grown up necessarily, but I don’t feel grown up. I feel like I’m in a weird in between stage, where you’re not quite either of those things. Does anyone else feel that way?
I feel like I don’t really know what I want. Like, I love the idea of settling down, buying a house and all that and having that nice stable job. But I also want us to quite our jobs, buy a van and travel the world. Post Covid, that is. It’s like, I know what I want, but I really really don’t. Maybe I do have a quarter life crisis.
Speaking of Covid, we are heading back into a partial lock down, here in the Netherlands. Restaurants and bars have closed for the next few weeks, we are urged to stay home as much as possible, and I am back to partially working from home. It was really nice working from the office again, actually being at work, because working from home made me feel kind of disconnected sometimes. But I like the slower pace that I have whilst working from home. I wake up around the same time as I would if I were to go to the office, but I have a little more time to just wake up, have breakfast, let my coffee kick in, watch the news.. I can make pizza for lunch, I have an endless supply of my favourite tea and coffee (although the coffee I get at work is actually really good). It’s quite nice, actually, to have those days at home as well, even if I am still working.
How’s the situation where you live right now? Are things semi normal, or are you headed towards another lock down – or sort of lock down – as well?
Oh, totally random but back tot the getting older thing, I found my first grey hair a couple of months ago. That was weird. Mostly the thought that I am at an age where I can have grey hairs. It wasn’t a freak out “omg help I’m getting old” kind of weird but more of a, well yea, the fact that I am at an age where that can happen. Like I said before, I am officially closer to being in my thirties than to being a teenager. Only by a couple of months, but it is a strange thought non the less. It just sounds.. I don’t know. It sounds not like me, it doesn’t sound like how I feel , but then it does. I guess age is strange that way. And mostly the idea you have by a certain age, that picture that you have in your head of what a certain age looks and feels like that then doesn’t match up with what it actually is. At least for me, maybe other people feel and experience it differently.
I feel like this post is very all over the place, but it’s been playing on my mind for a while now and I just wanted to chat about it for a bit. I’m curious to know how you feel about the age you’re at. Does it match with how you thought it would be, or is it totally different?
Thanks for stopping by ❤